COW Wrestling: Past Articles

Past Articles

What can happen that hasnt happened already? Well let me start off with MilkMan, who is back this week which many people have been waiting for. He has officially been released from the hospital the day before Thanksgiving. But you already knew that. He went back for his check-up, and everything seems to be fine...Except for the odd doctor wanted to put MilkMan on a diet......Like he hasnt lost enough weight sucking on IV fluids and being poisoned. Alright on top of that. MilkMan has been assigned a a personal security guard, whom doesnt work for COW. By COW. An official statement from the Heads says, " we want to make sure this doesnt happen again. We cant afford to lose MilkMan yet again." Which makes it clear that MilkMan is a valuable asset to the company.

FaTe eludes the police and the federalies. He is not wanted for any crimes, seeing as how there is no proof of any crime, besides many eye witnesses of him attacking WhYno and DD. But they say it isnt valid, because they were all drunk and talking to a bunch of drunks wont stand up in court. He is wanted for questioning in the attack of Senor Sexxay. All of the attacks on him.

Senor Sexxay has been attacked for a third time. The first time was not a personal attack on Sexxay but on his bar. The second attack was when Sexxay was leaving his bar to make a bank drop off....And it was not a robbery, because all of the money was still on his person. And the latest attack took place Saturday night, November 29th. A day before he was set to be released. Sexxay was taking a walk around the hospital when he walked by a door which swung open and smacked into him and knocked the IV out of his arm, which made him bleed profusely. After that Sexxay doesnt remember much of what happened. Because he passed out. Sexxay was found screaming in the hallway by a candy striper who was happening by after the attacker left. The candy striper said she had heard something, and started that way and saw someone running away but they were dressed in very dark clothes on, and they had some sort of Halloween mask on. Sexxay was put into a secure room, and had to be given a blood transfusion. Sexxay did not suffer too many more injuries but he does have a ruptured vessel in his eye. Which has been said it will heal completely. Sexxay looks like he has blood shot eyes. No visitors are allowed in to see Sexxay and he is not allowed out. Sexxay said, "This feels like Jail." He will be kept in the hospital until Wednesday, and if he continues to improve then he will be released and allowed to return to work by the end of the week.

What is the latest word in the COW locker room? "Purple rain".

CA DuDley has been making many advances towards MilkMan and to no avail. CA even offered to be MilkMan's personal security guard, who "will be there 24/7 if need be."

CA DuDley has completely shunned Triple S moving on swiftly from him turning his attentions to MilkMan. Triple S has been completely devastated and has even said he cant believe that CA no longer likes him. He says his crush still remains and will for a long time to come.

Jaso and Christopher Eugene still continue to bicker like a bunch of "bit**es" according to a close friend. Now they are bickering over who would win if they got into a fight, and who is prettier, and who most deserves a shot at the COW Heavyweight title.
WHAT is up with that? And Rumor has it that Jaso and Christopher Eugene will be made to tag together at the next show. Now how is that for Strange?

Well COWcoholics, on that note we will end it for this week because it is Time for my Shock Therapy now...... Lat0r Gat0r

December 1st, 2003

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