COW Wrestling: Past Articles

Past Articles

Well Happy Holidays Everyone! Lets see where we should start out this week with the news. MilkMan is still on vacation. So I am the only one with the news this week.

MilkMan is reportedly running and hiding from CA DuDley, who has been supposedly following him. C.A has a huge crush on MilkMan after an incident where CA had to give MilkMan CPR. MilkMan has been hiding and avoiding everyone. And even refuses to comment. Come the new year though, MilkMan is supposed to be back at work. So for those of you who are missing his wittiness will have something to look forward to.

The Bar Off was a huge success for both bars. The first night House of Sexxay made more money, the second night Casa de Drunks made $10 more. On the last night of the baroff, they both came in within forty-eight cents of each other. The one who made the most by forty-eight cents was Casa de Drunks who sold an extra pack of gum.

The big news is.. The tag team of Perfect Amount is in a questionable state. Saturday Morning Maximillion Johnston III and Christopher Eugene had a huge falling out about well almost everything. And they have decided for the time being to take a break, and to not even talk to each other.

FaTe has still been hiding from police. But he is only wanted for questioning in the assaults on Senor Sexxay. FaTe is no definate suspect though, but the police would like to talk to him.

Senor Sexxay has been told by the Doctors that he should be out of his wheel chair by Valentines Day if he keeps progressing well, going to therapy, and if there is no further stress to his back or neck. Sexxay is ecstatic about the prognosis. And he was also told that he can be back wrestling as soon as March 1st.

Dangerous Dolphin has been evaluated by a psychiatrist and he has been cleared to be allowed to wrestle again. Before he was let out of the mental hospital where he admitted himself and before he was allowed out of police custody he was given some medications and he has been has his medication doses lowered as of December 18th. "Dangerous Dolphin has had so much positive reinforcement in his life that it seems as long as things stay as they are he might even be off his meds in a few months. He is somewhere stable, (even though it is not somewhere I would wish for him to be), but he is happy and doing a wonderful job at work. It is likely a relapse might happen so he just needs to stay away from stress for a little while, and continue going to therapy, and stress management courses," his doctor told us. Many people are happy about the fact that he has improved so well.

Jaso has been in many yelling quarrels with Christopher Eugene as of the past week. Not over anything in particular, but a lot over fashion and style yet again.

CA DuDley has been Santa and some have protested against that fact, and even said keep him away from the good little girls and boys, boys especially. But he does a pretty good job as Santa. He is not working with children per say, but rather working at a nightclub full of both female and male strippers. He loves to give the spankings too, he said that was his favorite part.

Ok now there is a lot of dispute on whether or not Truck has actually been seen with two beautiful ladies, and I will tell you he has been seen with them, they do not speak much English and they mostly speak Russian, but they seem to be quite happy in his presence. He will not say what they are doing with him, and they dont understand us. So we will have to leave it up to our imaginations.

Well COWcoholics, on that note we will end it for this week because it is Time for my Shock Therapy now...... Lat0r Gat0r.

December 22nd, 2003

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